Top 10 Rejected Valentine Candy Hearts

The top 10 rejected candy hearts for Valentine’s Day:

10. Of all the people in all the world, you’re one of them

9. You’re the condensation on my windshield

8. You make me forget my indigestion

7. I’d walk half a block just to get to you

6. If words could express how I feel about you, I’d say … um … hold on, it was right there on the tip of my tongue

5. I can’t come up with more than a dozen reasons we shouldn’t go out sometime

4. There are beautiful people in my life, and then there’s you 

3. You’re the reason the pages of my diary are blank

2. I’d wax my back for you

And speaking of wax, the #1 rejected candy heart is:

1. You make my ear wax sizzle


[Please add more in the comments!]

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8 Responses to Top 10 Rejected Valentine Candy Hearts

  1. You know what, I’m glad I’m not the first person who’s had my ear wax sizzle due to a pretty girl

  2. deelmo says:

    “Sure hon, you’re my everything – can you wait for the next commercial and we’ll talk about it”

  3. Persis says:

    “You are tolerable but not handsome enough to tempt me.” (ht: Jane Austen)

  4. “Are you an angel fallen to earth? ‘Cause you’ve got dirt all over your face.”

    “Come here often? Good, then maybe you can direct me to the frozen food section.”

    “I’ve been waiting all my life for you — that’s 52 years I’ll never get back.”

    Heard at a Scrabble game: “I need U. What good is this Q if I don’t have U?”

  5. Courtney says:

    LOL, these are awesome!😂😂😂

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