Twenty-five years ago this month I got married. Twenty-six years ago this month I didn’t even know my wife existed. Funny how life comes along like that.
At times it’s been like the steamiest scenes of the Song of Songs*:
How beautiful you are, my darling! Oh, how beautiful! Your eyes are doves.
How handsome you are, my beloved! Oh, how charming! And our bed is verdant.
Snort! She said their bed was “verdant”! (Look it up.)
At times our marriage has been like Luke 12:
Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to your life? Since you cannot do this very little thing, why do you worry about the rest?
Sometimes it’s more like James 4 –
“… you do not even know what will happen tomorrow.”
On that day twenty-five years ago, it kind of seemed like all three of those at once. One thing we knew, though, was that God is with us at all times. Good thing, too; without him those different stages of life can be scary, even the really great times. Because without God everything is meaningless (Ecclesiastes is an entire book on the subject, for crying out loud), but with him all things are good (as we know so well from the repeated and repeated and repeated times we’ve heard Romans 8:28).
Our marriage is a blessing, but I’m not the one responsible for that. In fact, there are times when I think I’m more of a curse. I feel horrible about it sooner or later, of course, but that doesn’t change the fact that I was less than I should have been for her. So what do I do? I rest in the fact that there is only One who is truly good for her. God is good all the time, and I’m not. The source and foundation of any solid relationship, one that has eternal significance, is him and not me.
God has blessed us these twenty-five years, and his word assures me he will do so for eternity.
* Here’s an illustrated take on the Song of Songs for our literalist friends. Take a look. It’s funny.